It is January, which means that the holidays are over, but for most places in America, the winter is still going strong. For a lot of us, it can be a season of winter blues, ranging from feeling extra tired with a lack of motivation to SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder), which is a form of depression. If you are noticing that you are feeling really down, a lack of motivation or interest in things that you enjoy, changes in your eating or sleeping habits, trouble focusing, feeling irritable, or thoughts of harm or suicide, you may be experiencing SAD and should reach out to a mental health professional. If you are experiencing milder forms of these symptoms, or just feeling extra negative about winter, here are some tips that can help to get you through, and maybe even enjoy it (at least a little).
Make the gingerbread in January. I love the Christmas season and all of the activities that come along with it. However, I am more introverted, and there are some times during the holidays when I would be perfectly content to stay home under a warm blanket and read a book. You could do a holiday activity every night of December, and still not do all the Christmas things that are possible to do, and trying to do it all feels really overwhelming
(at least to me). Plus, there can be a disappointing feeling once it is all over. For my own sense of balance, I find it helps to see what things can still be done after Christmas. For
example, we made these Christmas gingerbread (and “ninjabread”) cookies a couple of
weeks after Christmas, and they were great. It was a fun activity, and kept the joy of the
season going. I also vote that you can watch Christmas movies all year round, and keep the tree up for as long as you like.
Re-evaluate your resolutions and make small, achievable goals. Now is about the time that our resolve is starting to fizzle out on our resolutions, and that can feel discouraging- adding to the gloom of winter. If you made a resolution, but realized that it was too hard to keep up, it doesn’t mean that you need to give up completely. It may mean that you just need to re-evaluate things and make changes so that your goal doesn’t feel so impossible. For example, if your resolution was to work out more, and you are finding that getting to the gym every day isn’t going to work with your busy schedule, it doesn’t mean that you have to give up trying to exercise completely. It just means to think of different ways that it is possible to get some exercise during a busy day, or instead of going to the gym every day, try seeing if you can go 2-3 times a week. We can easily beat ourselves up and feel like we’ve failed when we don’t reach our goals, but remember- just because you don’t reach your goal the way that you planned at first, doesn’t mean you have failed or that your goal was bad, and it doesn’t mean you should completely give up. It just means you need to look at it as an opportunity for learning, rethink your approach and break things down into smaller, more attainable steps. When you achieve the small steps, it helps to build momentum and confidence, which helps to fight away those negative winter vibes.
Check your negative self-talk. When we get stuck in a negative rut (like when we give up on our resolutions), it can be really easy to be hard on ourselves. When we are struggling, it is easy to see the areas we are falling short. We feel pressure and tell ourselves all the things we “should” be doing, adding guilt to our already negative mood. Try to be more aware of how you are criticizing yourself, and ask yourself “would I say this to someone else?” Often we are a lot harder on ourselves than we are on others. If it isn’t something you would say to a friend or loved one, don’t say it to yourself. Show yourself the compassion that you would show to someone you care about if they were struggling. Also, remind yourself and ground yourself in what is true. You are made in God’s image. You were fearfully and wonderfully made, and God as a plan and a purpose for you. You have value and you matter. Repeat those things to yourself because they are true, even when you don't feel it.
Set time limits in the spaces where you get stuck. If you feel like you are staying in bed all day, try to set a time limit for when you need to get up. If you find you are reaching for the comfort food (for example, chips) try to put some on a plate or bowl and limit the amount you eat. If you notice that you are spending a lot of time checking-out to games or social media on your phone, try setting an alarm for when it is time to stop and do something else. You don’t have to deprive yourself of extra sleep, comfort food, or screen time, but if you find yourself getting stuck and spending more time than you would like in these things, then try to put some things in place to help you feel more self-control.
Remember what you enjoy. Depression often lies to us and tells us lots of excuses why we shouldn’t do things that we know we would enjoy if we could just get started. Try to recognize when you are telling yourself more roadblocks than reasons to do something fun. Doing fun things can be energizing and help you to feel less stuck in negative thought patterns.
Check your vitamins. Talk to your doctor and make sure that your body is getting what it needs. In the winter time, with the shorter, colder days, we are getting less sun and less vitamin D. We are also often eating more carbs and comfort foods, which means we might not be getting the vitamins we need from fruits and vegetables. Studies are finding that some vitamin deficiencies, such as some B vitamins and vitamin D are linked to symptoms of anxiety and depression. There is still research being done to see if taking supplements reduces symptoms of depression, since many factors contribute to depression, but taking care of your body is never a bad idea if you want to improve your mood and mental health. Remember that when our bodies don’t feel good, then our mood is going to also be affected. Doing things to help your body feel well is a good way to improve your mental health.
Create a self-care routine. Again, taking care of your physical health is going to help your mental health, but it can be a challenge in winter. Our brains are producing more melatonin, making us feel more tired, and that can also make it hard to exercise and take the time to eat healthy. Try to have a good sleep schedule, and find ways to add more movement into your day to help with energy. Also, if you aren’t getting much time outside, light therapy (which involves sitting in front of a special light box for about 30 minutes a day) has been shown to help with seasonal depression and also major depressive disorder. Talk to your health care professional if you think this might be something that is right for you.
Grow something green. Do you grow houseplants? I love plants, even the fake ones. Something about seeing something green and earthy makes me feel good inside. I love watching things grow, too, and my clients would probably tell you I use way too many garden and plant analogies. I even wrote a previous post about it here. Studies have shown
that adding something green to your space reduces stress, brings on a more relaxed feeling and brightens your mood. Seeing a green, thriving plant can also help during the winter
when most of what we see outside is brown and dormant. Having something to take care of also can be a good motivator. I have a plant in the background of my office space to help make a session feel more comfortable and inviting. Not much of a green thumb? Even a faux plant can warm up a space and make it feel more calm and peaceful.
Talk it out. Feeling down or depressed usually makes us want to isolate ourselves more than usual, making us feel alone or like we are the only ones who struggle. Try to challenge those feelings by reaching out and connecting to other people. I promise you are not alone, and you don’t have to walk through this season alone. Talking to someone you trust and knowing that you are cared about can feel like a warm blanket in this cold winter. Reach out to a friend, loved one, mentor, pastor or counselor. It can help to talk through some of the feelings that are weighing on you. Putting words to your feelings often helps to lighten that weight, and allows you to see new perspectives and new solutions to problems. Praying or writing in a prayer journal is another great way to “talk it out” and put words to those hard emotions that may feel too big or vulnerable to share with others. God knows your heart, He sees you and understands. You are never alone, and connecting to God through prayer is a reminder that He is there.
Remember that winter is just a season. The author of the book of Ecclesiastes tells us “For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven” (v. 3:1). He lists several examples, including “a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance.” It is normal to have seasons where things feel hard. It is a part of life to have a full range of emotions, including times of sadness. Your winter blues won’t last forever, and it is often in those dark winter days that we can remind ourselves to have hope. Winter is just a season. Spring is coming. The sun will feel warm and the flowers will bloom again. And the truth is, we love and appreciate spring more because it follows winter. In life, it is often because we have felt the sadness and struggle, that we can better appreciate the joy and have gratitude in a season of laughter. Don’t push away the sadness or beat yourself up for feeling what you feel, but try to look at it as a season of learning that can help lead you to a season of growth, gratitude, beauty and joy.
I hope you find these suggestions helpful. These are just a few ideas, and if you are struggling, hopefully you can find some things that work for you. There are lots of things not on this list, too, so use your own creativity to come up with ideas that might help lift your spirits. Feel free to share those ideas, too! Helping others is another great way to feel good and feel more connected. We are all battling through this winter together, so the more tools we have to get through it, the better!
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